Sunday, June 28, 2009

6 Years

We are going back to maktab
The authorities there are so faktab
It is like living in a lock up
You see Baharum you better shut up
Before his ignorant and anger lit up
Very early you have to wake up
Before kuliah, you need to do a warm up
1.30pm, time up
Other students really like to suck up
Some of the pegawai, hanya pandai cakap
Decision making, they all mess up
This course, I can’t wait to finish up

One more year and then I’m out
Make a name and go all out
6 years of studying
Can make your life boring
But UPM’s life is novelty
Knowledge and experience
that you can cherish sampai mati
From theatre,
you create a new and know your friends,
And sometimes,
it makes you lost a friend,
But lucky me,
I met my lover,
And I never regret meeting her
I began to study and like literature
Because of Dr Edwin’s lecture.
Lucky us, we studied under him
If not, my teaching life turns dim.

6 years of studying
Can make your kepala pening
But these 6 years
of knowledge and experience that you have
Is one of the important things
that you ever have
It shapes your mind
your personality
throughout these years
Based on the events,
and knowledge
during these 6 years

Friday, June 26, 2009

Goodbye James

To tell you the truth, I’m not that very enthusiastic to go to Singapore anyway. If you read my earlier post about Singapore, it was too sudden and I wasn’t prepared for it. Plus, James was a bit pushy and even called my dad to ask (or force) me to go. And then, something unthinkable happened. After got back from Brunei, I called him about our trip to Singapore. What surprised me was that he actually changed our schedule. Just because he knows that I’m going to drive there, he actually changed plan. My parents’ face changed. They thought that he already planned when to go. The next day, I called him again to confirm when to go. I hate when they plan something at the last minute.

I just got back from West Malaysia and still tired from the trip. Dead tired. He said not sure. Probably Thursday, probably Friday. I begin to hate this guy. He is like using me. My parent got irritated as well. I told him that ‘you better confirm James. Because I’m going back to JB next week. There are a lot of things to do.’ He said Friday then we go. Ok. Confirm. Friday we go. The end. I informed my parent about it.

The next day, he sms me this.

Hi shah! Or should I say Mr. Strauss. Because there is a chance we could leave this Thursday afternoon for Singapore. You can look forward to more Singapore. You can look forward to more time there to browse. You could pack your stuff and be on stand-by this Thursday, couldn’t you?

He just spoiled every plan that my mom and I already planned to do. I asked him to really confirm it because this is too sudden. If my parent hears this, they will definitely piss off.

He sms this to me.

Alright. I will know Thursday morning if all systems, so please pack your bag etc. by then, I really hope to be there by Thursday.

I felt like being used. I feel like a driver to him. I thought James already schedule everything. I told my mom about this and her face changed. She said don’t confirm with James about the trip yet. Discuss with my dad. So, I called him. Told him everything. His tone changed.

He said,

‘Tell James that you are not going there by car. Ask him to book bus tickets to go to Singapore. Sometimes, you need to teach him a lesson. You are not his cabby. That is my final decision.’

‘Pa, don’t you think this is soo last minute?’

‘Xpe, jangan risau. Kata papa cakap macam tu.’

Fyi, my parent never like James. I respect him for his intelligence. But when you become that intelligence, you can be a little bit bossy; you are always thinking you are right and demanding. (Errm, This reminds me of someone). The only reason why we stick with him is because of Kak Yasmeen. A Malay woman who is very humble and kind. I respect her. The only Malay woman that the Mont Blanc company in Singapore respect.

I called James about going by bus. He pissed. He asked why. I said I don’t know. I added that my dad wasn’t confidence with me of driving suddenly. He said this is too last minute and blablalalala. I said that he better called my dad about this. Silence surrounds us. And then, he hung up. A few minutes later, I received a sms.

Shah I am going to Corus hotel tomorrow morning to check whether there are bus tickets TO Singapore and FROM Singapore for return trip. If there are then it will be RM 80 one way. We can get return ticket in Singapore. If there are still tickets. I will pay first for you.

Now, we learn literature, right? Why does the author or writer uses capital letter in their writing? Anyone? Now, look at James sms. He used capital letter on TO and FROM. Capital letter can be used as to stress something important, make someone notice, the sense of urgency or difficulty (I guess). But why James capitalized TO and FROM? Probably he wants to tell me that we are going to Singapore and going back from Singapore. Or, probably to show that it is going to be hard for us to find bus tickets and dreadful To go to Singapore and going back FROM Singapore by bus. Well, this is like literature. Give me your interpretation.

Another thing I want to discuss about this sms is that he told me that he will cover all my expenses which are accommodation, food and transportation. But why suddenly he said “I will pay first for you.” Probably he forgot that he supposes to pay or he just so angry that he tried to make me felt guilty because I owe him. Maybe. Or probably it just in my head. However, one thing that is certain, he is scared of my dad. He hung up after I said ‘try to call my dad’.

5 minutes later, he sent me another sms.

James : Ok. What made him lose confidence in you suddenly?

I said I don’t know. “You better ask my dad. It was his decision”

James : I will. I hope you did not knock down a cat or something. I asked him repeatedly when almost buying air Asia tickets if he really wanted you to drive and he said yes because you need the experience (since you have to drive to JB for school too). I can even get my friend in JB to drive us but this too last minute. And I just found out Yasmeens brother bought the parking coupons for your car already. (Actually, I don’t. I’m used to driving back and forth JB-KL)

I just said sorry and added ‘well, shit happen.”

He sent me another sms.

Shit happens accidently, not decisively. Really if I can’t get a ticket tomorrow I need you to drive. Personally, do YOU WANT TO drive and are YOU CONFIDENT?

I sent him this.

I can drive n ok with it. The idea of me drivin was from my dad. That why u better ask him. It was his idea.

James last sms with me and probably ever.

It’s alright. Don’t worry about it. Let’s see what troubling his conscience. Maybe as a father he is worried about your independent capability because unlike Shafiq who is already working, he feels you are still untested yet and naïve. It is natural. It’s possible he could not say this to me so as not to disrespect you. I can understand. Keeping to his word means nothing compared to making a wrong decision by letting you risk something on your own. And I know how you feel too. It’s never easy growing up with doting protective parents. You get pampered and stifled too. I was once a child too. It can be embarrassing at times in front of more independent friends but parents are human too and they can make mistakes too. Though not everybody can understand or accept it, especially outsiders. We just need to keep on learning with each experience, whether its family or friends. As Steve chandler said, ‘the idea is not to let the mistake be repeated twice.’ So, take it easy and hope we get bus tickets. I spent RM 200 just today calling Singapore to arrange to go there fast.

It seems he wanted me to rebel with my parent by referring me as untested and naïve and comparing me with my brother. I not sure whether shafiq is more independent than me and so on, I know that both of us never compare ourselves with each other. Even my parent. Protective and dotty? My Parent? Hell no. I showed this sms to Shafiq and he was so pissed. Even called James ‘A Bitch’. I said to him ‘No, bastard. Because he is a guy.” “No, he is a bitch. Main sedap dia je cakap macam 2. Dia tu tau sgt ke family kita. Dia sendiri xnk ada ank. Ape yang dia tau.” Whoa. That is harsh. Oh well. I’m glad that I didn’t go to Singapore. That night, my mom called my dad that she does not allowed me to go to Singapore because James using me. Actually, I asked her to do that. I’m tired from the previous trip and felt like being used. My dad said ok. He called James. But before that, I told him about the sms. He just kept quiet and slowly grabbed his hand phone and type something that he would not let me see. After that, James hasn’t sms me since. Case close.

Sunday, June 21, 2009


My love : Larat x? Bgslah 2. Jauh perjlnn, luas penglaman.
Me : Syg, bkn ke jauh perjlnn, luas pandangan ke?
My love : Dua2 pn leh pakai lh. Eii, cubit kang.

Ladies and gentlemen, I just got back from Brunei and Sarawak. Yeahhhhhhh. After the trips, I have discovered a new hobby; travelling. Based on the sms’s conversation that I had between my love and I when I was in West Malaysia, both of them are true. When you travel, your views about the world are widened and you gain a lot of experience, knowledge, language and skill if you have the chance. I was fortunate to have this kind of opportunity and to tell you the truth, this is an expensive hobby. The process of travelling has it up and down (dealing with people who close with us and locals), but the result, PRICELESS!!! I wish in the future, I am able to go travelling or back packing with Nina when we have the capital and time to do it. If possible, go outside Malaysia. I think it is important for us to travel. I remember when we went to Malacca and I asked Mr. Tham, ‘Is it necessary for an artist to travel?’ He said yes and this is because to widen his views, in gaining idea and look at the world differently if I recalled it correctly. But to me, everyone should travel. Whether you are an artist or not, everyone should. Karim Raslan wrote a lot of articles about politics, art, society and economy when he travels and share it with public. Dr. Edwin also encouraged us to travel. I have many things to say about my recent trips but I am so exhausted and I definitely need a rest. (I haven’t been sleeping well actually). On 26th June, I will be going to Singapore and probably be back on 29th June. So, wish me luck.

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Suggestion To My Friends.

Well, we are going back to maktab and there will be no Dr. Edwin class to learn literature, but that doesn’t mean we cannot learn and discuss literature among ourselves. We can still do it. Even after graduate. We are going to become an English teacher and literature is one of the subjects that we should master.
So, my suggestion is, if you have something that is considered literature and meaningful to discuss whether it is a poem, picture, song, speech, whatever, post it in your blog or you create your own blog just to discuss the thing that is literature and worth discussing. In your post, you can give your comment or interpretation of the material that you present and other people can critic and give their opinion about it. It is something like the forum that we did with Dr. Edwin. (I miss him so much. Can I do another project paper?)
I think it is quite helpful because it is not just to practice or train ourselves to become critical thinker and appreciate literature, but it is also help us in getting the material that is suitable to teach to our students. Plus, we can still contact each other through blogging even after graduate and discuss how we are going to teach our students through the use of the material that we present in our blog. If you want too. We are going to become a new breed of teachers. Right, Amanda, Kei? I think this is one small step for B.Ed Tesl Cohort 3 in becoming a new generation of teacher that surpass the old, mediocre, traditional and boring teachers. We will show maktab and Malaysian who we are. We are the unsung heroes.
Below is my blog address for this literature discussion. I use my previous blog from Dr. Edwin coursework. It will be a waste if leave your blog unattended.
So, good luck and please inform me your blog address if you want me to give my point of view. If you want to discuss it in the same blog, that is fine. Bye. Peace and Prosper to mankind.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

To save one life is as if you have saved the world

Yesterday, I was reading back all my posts and what I had posted from my ally blogs. Then, I came across atie’s blog. I read all the posts again and I stumbled on the response that I gave to her which stated “Changing someone life for better are more meaningful than curing a disease. You can cure many patients but people will end up dead in the end. People will die anyway.” Suddenly it hit me. The reasons why I gave those statements are because I want to cheer up atie and the people expectation about teacher. It seems people nowadays have a bad perception about teacher. I probably say this because I am going to be a teacher soon and try to defend myself, but people nowadays measure their success based on their position, financial and their possessions. For example, like engineer, doctor and businessman. Their success is measure by how much money they are making, their skill in curing disease and their creation.
People have bad impression toward teacher (some of them actually) because they have a fixed salary and teaching is considered like a low or middle type of profession by most people. Their works are not measured by how much money they are making, their position or rank and how many inventions that they create. They are measured by how many people or students that they have enlightened to become a better person. Still, they continue their duty with fix salary. People nowadays value their works or success through inanimate things; money, fame and rank. They seldom value their effort based on the change that they have contribute to society. They value it mostly on what they have.
Even though you have a lot of money, it will not help you if you are dead. (Unless you want to use it to bury yourself at Nirvana). Although you cure many people, people will end up dead in the end. Death is the only disease that cannot be cure. How many infrastructures or magnificent building that you build, it would not stay there forever. One day it will collapse, terrorist attack, natural disaster and so on. It will be destroyed and worth nothing anyway when Kiamat comes and destroys it (Apocalypse, Judgment Day, and The Hour). But one thing that is considered meaningful even greater is a good deed. What is a good deed? To do good thing? Yeah. That is a simple explanation. But to me, a good deed is when you change someone life for a better. What kind of occupation that more suitable or close to that? Teacher. Why? Because they change people. From ignorant and naïve, teacher teaches or imparts knowledge and shapes the mind of their students. They enlighten them, changing them to become better person.
Changing someone life for better is like saving someone life in my opinion. This reminds me of a quote in the Tahmud from the Jewish holy book. “To save one life is as if you have saved the world.” I know this quote from the movie ‘Schindler’s List’. Although his real intention was to profit from using Jews as a labor, Schindler unintentionally saved many Jewish (I am not saying I am Semantic sympathizer or anything). When the WW2 was over and Schindler was asked to go trial or he maybe he want to escape (I think), the Schindler’s Jews gave him a ring with a writing on it ‘To save one life is as if you have saved the world’. He began to cry. Then, he said that he could sell the house and save 10 more people. He could sell his house and save 10 more people and so on. He began to shed tremendous tears because he believed that he can save more lives.
In my opinion, teacher saves life. How? By transforming uncivilized and ignorant human being, into a thinker, civilized, well-mannered, intellectual human being. Able to think in improving themselves, question and discover knowledge and benefit it to the society. Teacher saves lost soul from the realm of darkness to realm of light. Giving a hand to escape from the pit of hell. Teacher is members of the Illuminati (The Enlighten). I think I am exaggerating. I have just created a hyperbole.
Well, whatever it is, the teacher duty to enlighten people is considered as saving life. Even though you can’t enlighten or change many people, but to change a few, you have created a new world for them. A better world. What the teacher does is considered a good deed. And this good deed, not just be meaningful in this world, but it will be accounted for in the afterlife.
Now, most of you people who read my blog are those who studying with me. And you guys are definitely depressed because we are going back to maktab. I am also depressed. One more year, guys. One more year. But I think we all are going to be more depressed when we begin teaching. Students, parents, administration, time management, social problems, financial and family. Those are the things that we are going to encounter. Whatever the predicaments that you face when teaching them, always think that you are trying to save a life. The students are a lost soul who is seeking to be rescued. You are their savior. Prophet. It is going to be one hell of experience when we become a teacher. But your effort to change their lives, is bigger than life. Whether you get post somewhere that is not your comfort zone, just think of this. You are trying to get your students out from the ghetto. You are their Messiah.
Well, before I end my exaggerate post, I want to show you guys something that can ease your mind about maktab and our future. This is from one of Dr Edwin students related to “My Favourite Teacher’s Day SMS for 2009” in Dr. Edwin blog which this student gave him this.
3 people die and want to go to heaven. God stood at the gate, told only 1 can go in, 2 go to hell.
1st:I’m a priest, I ask people to worship god. OUT
2nd:I’m a doctor, I save lives. OUT
3rd: I’m teacher.
Heaven’s door opened. Teacher got shocked.
God: Don’t say anything my child! You were in hell for many years!
Happy Teacher’s Day!

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

MAXIS: MAXimize Individual Spending.

I just converted my postpaid from maxis to celcom postpaid today. To keep my number, I became the Maxis user for more than 2 years and before that I have facing many problems with them, I can't do anything with that because to keep my number. Now, is the time! We can maintain number and change the provider. I had bad experiences with maxis when I began using it. A lot of hidden charges and the bill sometimes exaggerated. Based on my experiences with maxis, maxis service is deteriorating as we speak, cannot receive calls, cannot make calls; all calls will be forward into the mailbox instead of the phone. Before I use maxis, I used celcom. During that time, celcom has good customer service, good service and so far no problem with continuation with the lines. Since it's connected with Telekom Malaysia, it has a wider reception and coverage compared to other service providers. The rates are also reasonable and the T&C are not so hidden. Unlike other service provider, especially maxis, they don't put the T&C in newspaper ads which makes it sound like the offer or rates are so cheap, but, there are hidden charges or tying issues you must face behind the scenes. I am taking the Executive 50 Plan which you pay RM 50 a month. If you use more than RM 50, you still get a discount. 15 sen per minute and 12 sen per sms to any network. I think that okay. To reduce my family misery, I also took the 1+5 plan which allows my dad and Shafiq to pay only RM 5 a month when they call or sms me. So, my father, Shafiq and I now have two hand phone numbers and two hand phones each. The different is, both of my phone numbers are Celcom. One for Nina and the other for my family and general. But recently, celcom customer service has become a little bit inefficient. This had happened to Nina but I wish not to discuss it.

Friday, June 5, 2009

Visiting the Land of Pretending Lion

Where is this ‘the Land of Pretending Lion’? Can you guess? We always hear about the ‘Land of the Rising Sun’ which is Japan due to its geographical location. But where is the Land of Pretending Lion? Is it a place where there are a lot of lions and know how to act or pretend? Or is it a circus where you can see the lion act as if it is a human, monkey or very good actor? Hmmm. Let translates it to Bahasa Malaysia. Lion means Singa in BM and pretending means pura or berpura-pura in BM. And together, when we combine them, it becomes Singapura or Singa Berpura-Pura. Hehehe. Know where is it? It is a small island south of Malaysia where they keep all the lions that can act or pretend. Hahaha. Just kidding. It is a country that Malaysia government still pissed after Singapore separated from Malaysia. Still under each other throats.
I had shocking news early this morning. I am going to Singapore or Singapura. I was just about to go jogging and suddenly stumbled with my dad. He looked at me and said ‘James ajak Aji gi Singapore. Aji pegi tau. Enjoy’. Just like that. And then he went off to work. I was speechless. I couldn’t say a word. What a strange father I have. I looked at my mom and said what is going on. She told me that yesterday James asked my dad that he wanted to bring my brother and me to Singapore on 26th June to 28th June. To me, this is too sudden. A chance to visit another country? Yes. Too sudden? Yes. Plus, after coming back from Singapore, I am going back to JB. What is going on? It is very sad for my brother that he could not make it for the trip. He has to work on those days. So, it is going to be me, James and Kak Yasmeen who will be going. My mom told me that James will book a ticket for me for the trip. Air Asia baby.
I wasn’t planning to go anyway except go to Miri on 16th June with my family. Now, after coming back from Miri on 21 June, I have to go to Singapore on 26th June. What an experience. Now, I have to do my passport which cost RM 300. I probably am going to do it in Kajang. I spoke with my mom that I have a second thought about going to Singapore, but she said that I better discuss with my dad. I told her that I am not going to Singapore if Shafiq is not coming. Shafiq told me that he will discuss with Kak Yasmeen whether she can adjust his schedule.
Now, another twist reemerged. We are not flying to Singapore, but driving to Singapore. How fascinating is that. Who is going to drive? Me. James and Kak Yasmeen could not drive. James called my dad to get my dad approval for me to go to Singapore after I told him that I undecided whether I want to go or not. He desperately wants me to go there with him. My dad said that I will go and he wants me to travel and experience something new and so on. He hates me that I always hang out in my house far too long and probably scare that I will become Hikikamori. I think. ‘Putera Lilin’ he calls me. However, he questioned James as to why he wants to go to Singapore by plane. James told him that the Air Asia has this “0 Fares” thing that you do not need to pay for the fare but you only have to pay the airport tax and so on. But, he said that still cost RM 300 or something. Why not I drive them to Singapore? Thanks DAD. I called my dad and he said just go and have some fun. Oh well. I definitely going to miss Nina because when you are in Singapore, text message and call is expensive. Huhuhu. I want to go with her.